Taking Life One Day at a Time

Maturity and Immaturity

on June 24, 2011

A good guy friend of mine and I were texting the other day and we were having a random conversation when I made a comment and his response was,

“where do you get this stuff, none of my friends say anything like you do or have the mindset you do.”

My response was “that’s because their mentality isn’t as ‘old’ as mine genius.”

“You’ve always been much more mentally old. Kind of makes me think of those little girls who try to act so mature and older when they actually very young. I’m just like stop trying to act Mature and old your NOT!”

“Thanks for making me feel old and segregated!! But that’s true because even in high school remember, I was always ‘soccermom’. Although is that what you’re thinking about me? That I need to stop acting mature/older because I’m not?”

“NO! My comment was only pertaining to little girls.”

Him and I have been friends for about seven years now and we’re pretty bluntly honest with each other, but I couldn’t help feeling his comments on “maturity” irk me. What’s more, he’s not the only one whose made a comment like that. My sister has mentioned a few times about how “your trying to hard.” …So I started doing some reminiscing. Ok I know I’ve said it before and I might sound vain, but I really don’t have any other way of saying it aside from, I have a strong/stubborn/ambitious character. I was always acting older since I can remember…actually I remember significantly when things started turning to an “older” state. It all started, when I started pre-k. Throughout all my years in school (elementary, middle, junior high, and even high school) I was usually placed in a “leader/superior/overseeing” role in which I ended up either looking after someone/group or I’d put people in their place when they needed it. How it happened I don’t remember but things just continued to shift, mold, and continue. Junior high while everyone was excited about graduating I was already thinking about what classes I wanted to take my freshman year…when girls in high school were concerned or more in tune with who was going out with who or sports, I was busy with actually paying attention to class and trying to get ahead. I wasn’t some book worm (even if I did and still do like to read) I just didn’t want to waste valuable time in what was forming my future. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed everything about my high school years but after freshman year I was always known as “soccermom” because I was always taking care of others, and the age group didn’t matter. Which was shocking then as it is now, because most see me as a cold and detached person…I don’t try to act older and if that happens I try to internally keep an eye on it…hmm, anyway! Sorry I’m deterring away from the actual topic. I will ask this though, before moving on that is- is it so bad to be mentally older than your literal age?

So how mature are you?

I continually ask myself that question with every new difficult event/task that comes up…how you resolve or take care of a situation is how a person’s maturity level is defined. If an individual is still stuck in the mentality of high school, it will show. So I’m asking you, how mature are you? It’s of course been said that females mature faster than males however, by the looks of the newer generation of women; I’d have to say that that isn’t necessarily true. But who am I to say, right?

Just for the record, just because a person is mature doesn’t mean that they don’t enjoy themselves or want a night out on the town either, to have fun. NO ONE should categorize “mature” with dull or boring!

Well I found some interesting information on “Levels of Maturity” and thought/wanted to share it with you. So make sure to scroll down and continue reading if your interested 🙂

Yours truly,

A Young Adult

Human Relations Contributors

Chris Argyris

The fact that bureaucratic/ pyramidal values still dominate most organizations, according to Argyris, has produced many of our current organizational problems.

While at Yale, he examined industrial organizations to determine what effect management practices have had on individual behavior and personal growth within the work environment.

Personality changes

According to Argyris, seven changes should take place in the personality of individuals if they are to develop into mature people over the years.

  • First, individuals move from a passive state as infants to a state of increasing activity as adults.
  • Second, individuals develop from a state of dependency upon others as infants to a state of relative independence as adults.
  • Third, individuals behave in only a few ways as infants, but as adults they are capable of behaving in many ways.
  • Fourth, individuals have erratic, casual, and shallow interests as infants but develop deeper and stronger interests as adults.
  • Fifth, the time perspective of children is very short, involving only the present, but as they mature, their time perspective increases to include the past and the future.
  • Sixth, individuals as infants are subordinate to everyone, but they move to equal or superior positions with others as adults.
  • Seventh, as children, individuals lack an awareness of a “self,” but as adults they are not only aware of, but they are able to control “self.”

Argyris postulates that these changes reside on a continuum and that the “healthy” personality develops along the continuum from “immaturity” to “maturity.

These changes are only general tendencies, but they give some light on the matter of maturity. Norms of the individual’s culture and personality inhibit and limit maximum expression and growth of the adult, yet the tendency is to move toward the “maturity” end of the continuum with age.

Argyris would be the first to admit that few, if any, develop to full maturity.



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